Remember back to high school math for a minute. Logarithms are those curves that get close to a constant line but never, ever reach it. I see self-awareness as a logarithmic curve; you can become really self-aware but there’s always more to learn.
Sample Logarithmic Curve: Notice how the curve gets infinitesimally close to the x-axis but never reaches it.
What is self-awareness? Self-awareness defined as “conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feelings, motives, and desires.” It’s also about knowing how other people see you and what your impact is.
By being self-aware, you gain tremendous power in shaping your world. You can intentionally create and take responsibility for what happens. People who are highly self-aware are less likely to fall victim to things happening to them.
Why is self-awareness unachievable? Self-awareness is an infinite well of learning because there are big rocks to be aware of, small pebbles to learn and tiny grains of sand that will fill in your self-awareness for a lifetime. And as you learn more about yourself, you are continually changing, creating a moving target. For example, you may have learned that people see you as harsh and bossy, and by learning that you shifted how you show up. Now you show up differently and you’ll eventually learn the new way you show up when you’re not bossy anymore.
How can you gain self-awareness? There are literally thousands of books, courses, and tools that can help you gain self-awareness. Here are a few:
Coaching. Getting a coach can help by reflecting things back to you or holding up a metaphorical mirror for you to see you yourself better. They can then work with you to take actions based on what you see. Find a coach here: Find a CoActive Coach
Johari Window. This is a fabulous, free tool to help you see your blinds spots. It works like this; you enter in some characteristics on how you see yourself and then you send a link to a bunch of people you know and they do the same. The tool sorts out how you see yourself that others don’t, how you accurately see yourself, and things others see that you don’t. Johari Window
Books: There are many great books on this topic. Check out Emotional Intelligence 2.0 and The Anatomy of Peace for a start. Once you get started, you’ll find that each book leads you to another.
Self-awareness is a paradox. When someone tells me that they are really self-aware I almost want to yell “NO! A self-aware person would never say that!” The more self-awareness you gain, the less it feels like you have. It’s one of those things where each time you learn something a door opens to a world of things you don’t know.
What has your journey to self-awareness been like? We’d love to hear from you!